Most Important
by ChibiQuatre
Summary: Duo/Hilde ficcie. can't remember much...i've been outta commission 4 a while, and i wrote this a while ago. read 2 find out, and don't 4get to review!!!


Most Important  
By ChibiQuatre(6/19/00)  
  
  
Yet another GW disclaimer: well, do you all REALLY want me to write a disclaimer?! We all know that I don't own GW (though God KNOWS I wish I did!). The GW boyz r'nt mine, never were, never will b. They are owned by their respective creators; Sunrise, There...happy!!! ((oh, and any trouble translating the japanese, I'll b happy to help!))  
  
*Note: this is another Duo/Hilde fic. i think somewhere, it suggests yaoi, but i dunno. ^^* if it does, it's very little. so it's alright...just sit back n enjoy urselves!  
  
  
Hilde sighed.  
  
After their last mission, they had been allowed to visit Earth for a brief vacation.  
Quatre had graciously invited her and the other pilots to stay at his large manor.  
Not wanting to disappoint the blond boy, they had accepted the offer.  
  
I looked at the girl walking beside me. "Ne, are you okay Hilde?"  
  
She nodded. "I'm just a little tired, that's all."  
  
"Gomen," I laughed. "I've been told that I, uh, snore." Hilde slept in the bedroom  
next to mine.  
  
She laughed with me. "That's okay Duo. The walls are quite thin."  
  
"Heh, ya." I agreed and continued walking with Hilde. The parks were much  
bigger here on Earth than in the colonies.   
  
It was my turn to sigh. I caught Hilde's look, and said, "Ne babe. I was just  
thinkin..."  
  
She waited for me to continue, but I didn't. My words trailed off as my thoughts  
interrupted. Gosh, it sure was good to get away from all that fighting. The  
colonies could be so stuffy and confusing. Despite my birthplace, Earth is my  
home, not the little colony of L2.  
  
Hilde grabbed my arm and prodded me about what I was thinking. It was weird  
for her to see that I actually had something serious on my mind. Heh, I think it  
even scared her a little.  
  
"Hilde, wouldn't it be great if we didn't have ta fight?" I asked suddenly. After  
minutes had passed, she hadn't thought that I would say anything. Another rare  
occurrence.  
  
"What're you talking about Duo? We never fight," she answered naïvely.   
  
"Ha ha Hilde. Not us, I'm talkin' about war. What if we never fought in the war? If  
we didn't have to?"  
  
"Duo, we have to fight." She looked suddenly drained. I knew we shouldn't be  
talking about fighting when we didn't have to at the moment. The current mission  
was to relax, enjoy ourselves a little. But just as she prodded me, I pressed on.  
  
"Why do we have ta fight Hilde? Why? I don't think it even makes a difference  
whether or not we were born. That we became Gundam Pilots is beyond me. But  
did you ever stop to think, Hilde, what would happen if we had never existed?"  
  
"Duo, it does matter." I looked at her. What made her so certain that we aided  
the colonies in this war? It could be just as well that they hindered the colonies  
from advancing into the society of space, or that instead of helping to prevent  
war, we Gundam pilots were actually fueling it.   
  
"We're fighting for the colonies and those who need our help. Duo, do you  
remember your past? From before you became a soldier? That's what you're  
fighting for. Safety and security in a dangerous world."  
  
It was a mistake to argue with that girl. She could be so stubborn sometimes.  
What worried me was that she actually seemed to believe every word that left  
her mouth. I stared, mouth agape. Was she really that blind??  
  
"Hilde," I said. My patience was wearing thin. I couldn't believe that of all those  
involved in the war, my Hilde was among the ignorants. "Can't you see, Hilde?  
We as people aren't important in this war. The only thing that matters to the  
colonies is winning. We're just here to see that the right side wins. I mean, the  
world could care less if the Gundam pilots were executed. Who's to say what's  
important or not anymore?" I could see that I astonished Hilde with my  
'philosophical' views. Heero and the others would be surprised as well. They  
never imagined I could harbor such an idea in my head.  
  
So I continued. "Heero would say fighting is most important. Trowa would say  
winning is most important, and Quatre would say life is most important. Wufei  
believes that justice is the most important factor, but me? Well, Hilde...I don't  
know. I just don't know anymore."  
  
She looked at me as if I had gone insane...or as if I had been born with this  
mentality. Hilde was really angry; she hated having people contradict her,  
especially me.  
  
We continued walking in silence. During our conversation, we had gone around  
the entire park and found ourselves at the very spot we had started from. Kind of  
like our debate. We had talked and talked, but hadn't gotten anywhere. She still  
believed her story, I still didn't know what was so important that children lost  
their innocence for.  
  
This continued, this silence, for another half hour. Unlike other times, the silence  
was unbearable. It was not comfortable, no not at all. There was an unease  
between us, an almost tangible embodiment of static tension.   
  
I didn't like it.  
  
But I didn't know what to say. Our views conflicted; I knew they were only  
opinions, but we each believed that our individual opinions were correct. I didn't  
like fighting with Hilde, as I knew she would never give in. She was a true  
soldier...she never showed her weaknesses.  
  
So I knew it was up to me to mend our friendship. "It's getting late," I muttered. I  
turned back and started towards the Winner mansion. I could feel Hilde's  
presence behind me, following my every move like a shadow.  
  
"Duo."  
  
The voice followed me. I stopped and turned around. Hilde was looking at me  
with sorrow in her eyes and tears threatening to stain her face.  
  
What? The soldier was showing weaknesses? This was not like Hilde.  
  
"Duo," she said again. I listened. "Is--is--love important, to you?" I knew she was  
referring to our debate, but chose to ignore that. "Of course babe! You know  
that."  
  
"Iie Duo. You know what I mean." Hilde was starting to get angry again.  
  
I closed my eyes. "I know what you meant," I replied softly. "And I wasn't lying.  
Love is the most important thing. Love makes the world go round. So it's only  
natural that love is important."  
  
"Duo, the question was, is love important to you?"  
  
There was a certain edge to her voice. Expectant, hesitant almost.  
  
What was she thinking? I looked at her. Of course love is important. I mean, why  
would she even ask that?   
  
It was unimaginable to me why anyone would question love's importance. Love,  
in my opinion, was the most necessary component in life. Without love, there  
was no life.   
  
What confused me even more was that Hilde, of all people, asked me. She  
should know me better than that. It's me, Duo! The life of the party Duo...the  
happy-go-lucky Duo.  
  
The Shinigami Duo.  
  
My mind reeled as the thought appeared in my dense little head: I was the God  
of Death. I invited death to every mission, and I decided when he would leave. I  
was the one who decided when death was through torturing those who had once  
begged for their lives and now lay decimated on the ground.  
  
I was the ending, the omega...W. I destroyed lives with my Gundam Deathscythe.  
If love was worth more than life, or was the equivalent, then not only was I  
ruining lives, but at the same time, I was destroying love.   
  
I had never thought about the soldiers I killed. How many of them had families?  
How many had children? And now, how many of those wives and children were  
widows and fatherless?  
  
Realization. Now I realized why Hilde had asked me if love was important. Far  
from the innocent girl, Hilde was a brilliant, strong-minded soldier who helped  
me see the truth, the injustice of my conducts as Wufei would put it.  
  
Quatre would be disappointed. All along, he thought that life was the most  
essential component in war. He would be surprised when I told him that love was  
most important.  
  
I frowned. But then again, Quatre always had something to him. We all called it  
his Uuchu no Kokoro. It allowed him to 'read minds' and feel others emotionally.  
  
So maybe Quatre already knew.  
  
Hilde looked at me. I guess she thought I wasn't going to answer because the  
next moment, she turned away and ran back the direction we had just come  
from. Before she hurried away, I caught a look of disappointment on her delicate  
features.  
  
Hilde, I thought. What was up with her? And I jumped in surprise as another  
thought hit me. Hilde...love??   
  
Baka! Duo no baka! I can't believe I didn't see it, even after Hilde had put it into  
the open. Even Heero or Trowa could probably see it. But not me, no. Not Duo.  
  
I slapped myself in the forehead before I came to yet another realization. Hilde  
was getting away! The one girl who...who...  
  
I couldn't let her get away. Not because of a stupid question that had gone  
unanswered. But how would I answer it?  
  
I ran after her.  
  


***  


  
I ran until I couldn't run anymore. Exhausted, I slumped against a tree.   
  
And cried.  
  
I hadn't cried for a long time, not after I became an OZ soldier. But Duo pushed  
me over the edge.   
  
Why wouldn't he answer my question?   
  
I couldn't bear it any longer. Well, if Duo didn't think love was important, then I  
wouldn't push him. I'd leave him alone, never bother him again.  
  
But I just couldn't believe that Duo could be that empty shell of a human, to not  
believe in the strength of love. 'Love conquers all,' the old saying went. There  
was another that also said, 'Love makes the world go round.'  
  
But I guess Duo wouldn't know about that, would he?  
  
I slid down the thick trunk of the burly oak until I found myself sitting on the  
ground. Then I broke down. Tears were streaming out from closed eyelids and  
falling heavily, enchanted by gravity, back to the earth.  
  
Could Duo not see? I love him, and I think he loves me too; but why doesn't he  
say anything? I've seen the way he looks at me sometimes, when he thinks I'm  
not looking.  
  
I continued crying, sobbing. I didn't care if anyone saw me. I was on earth, the  
one place where I could possibly feel at home, and I was feeling very very alone.   
  
I heard familiar voices behind me and turned around. Hidden behind the trunk,  
Quatre and Trowa couldn't see me. I heard them, talking. It was a rare thing for  
Trowa to talk. I was happy for them, particularly the taller pilot. Quatre brought  
out the best of people.   
  
I kept staring at them as they walked into the sunset. Happy ending, I thought  
dryly. And remorsefully. Everyone could have happy endings but me.  
  
As I continued staring at the pilots 03 and 04, I didn't hear the soft footsteps  
come up behind me. As a hand brushed my shoulder, I whirled around, ready to  
attack.  
  
But I relaxed as I saw it was only Duo. Well, not really only Duo. My Duo. Only,  
he didn't know that, did he?  
  
He looked at me. I saw my tear-streaked face reflected in his own glimmering  
violet eyes. "Hilde," he said painfully, seeing my tears.  
  
I turned away. I had nothing to say anymore.  
  
Duo ran around to face me, and held my shoulders so I couldn't move. "I'm sorry,  
Hilde," he said. He buried his face in my hair.  
  
I believe he was crying as well.  
  
I heard his silent sobs in my ear and felt them as I wrapped my arms around him.   
  
He was forgiven.  
  
And somehow, he knew that. "Ai shiteru, Hilde."   
  
I drew back. What did he say??  
  
"Ne, Duo?"  
  
He looked astonished as well, like he hadn't meant to say he loved me. But I had  
to hear it again. I had to confirm my hopes.  
  
Duo blushed as he answered. "I--I said, ai shiteru Hilde." Then he looked down  
and closed his eyes. "I love you Hilde."  
  


***  


  
We stayed like that for a minute: me staring at the ground, embarrassed, and  
she staring at me incredulously.  
  
What had possessed me to do something like that?  
  
It wasn't like me, at all. Well, that's what I thought. The other pilots, even Hilde,  
would say it reeked of Duo.   
  
Finally, I couldn't stand the waiting. I slowly brought my gaze to meet hers...  
  
And gaped in shock. Hilde was smiling.   
  
Not any ordinary smile. A smile of pure happiness. Pure sugary sweetness. Like  
the jelly donut I had for breakfast, but much sweeter.  
  
I couldn't help but smile myself. It was just like me to compare someone like  
Hilde to something like donuts. I laughed softly.  
  
Hilde stared at me, then giggled herself. Her giggle turned into a chuckle turned  
into a laugh turned into near-hysterics, quite like mine. Soon, we were laughing,  
holding our stomachs, rolling on the ground. Laughing as we never had before.  
  
Laughter really is wonderful, but not as wonderful as love. Although, when one  
thought of it, laughter is the medicine of life, and if laughter fed life, it also fed  
love. Therefore, laughter was the counterpart to life and love. Being the  
conterpart to two equals, nothing is most important or less equal. Without one,  
there could not be the other.   
  
It was like a cycle. The never-ending cycle, the true meaning of the universe.  
  
Hilde and I were laughing for partly different reasons; but in the end, laughter is  
like life and love.   
  
It's all the same.  
  
  
~OWARI~  
  
  
  
I don't know what possessed me to write this, but i did. i think Duo n Hilde make a kewt couple, don't u? well, hope you liked it! questions, comments? suggestions? e-mail me and b sure 2 review minna-san! oyasumi nasai and ja!  
  
ChibiQuatre @ tigerlily6c@aol.com


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